I got to spend a week with Mom and Mike, and while it wasn’t a hoot-and-a-howl, it was nice just being with them both and doing what I could to help.  Which usually meant doing some errands, cleaning up a bit, doting on Mom, and just talking with them.  It’s hard to wrap my mind around what’s happening…how do you go about telling the person who shaped who you’ve become how very much she’s loved and honored? 

A good friend from College and I have reconnected this past year and I learned from her that she went through the same thing with her Dad.  It’s really nice having a sounding board who knows how you’re feeling and that having an occasional emotional outburst is OK.  I feel like I’m at the starting line of a race I know I can’t win, and one I don’t want to run. 

So the week was spent driving Mom nuts with my doting and asking how she’s feeling.  I mean honestly, how many times does the woman need to tell me she feels like ‘bunk’ when I know she’s gotta be miserable feeling so sick and tired?  Together we wrote up her Power-of-Attorney and Will, and I picked up information from Boulger’s Funeral Home so she can meet with them today and make arrangements.  It’s crazy to me that Mom is planning her own service, and saddens me that I can’t be closer to home to help more or just sit with her. 

Michael is a gem who I know is having a difficult time with this.  Since I’m your typical stoic Norskie, I don’t often say what I feel, preferring to allow my actions to relay the love and respect I have for others.  I’m learning fast that to take a chance and say how you feel is a gift this terrible ordeal has afforded me.  I tell Mom every time I talk to her that I love her.  And the last time I saw Mike, I gave him a hug, thanked him for everything he’s doing for Mom, and that I love him.  I lost my voice after that and had to go to bed.  I guess it’s me growing up a little. 

     ~ BethAnn